Radio Isopod

Attention S.S. Isopod Crew,

Indeed, I am completely aware of our unplanned extended study of the Chukchi Sea and the Aurora Borealis due to the S.S. Isopod freezing to the ice sheet for the last two months. You will be pleased to know that we have found the problem and managed to free the ship. Therefore, you can now stop  grumbling about the cold and the excessively fish themed menu.

However, I would like to point out if wasn’t for certain scientists’ blatant disregard of ship protocol by rerouting the hull’s defrost power relays to turn lab 42 into their personal sauna and tanning salon, we would not be in this position.

Also, those that are responsible for placing the animatronic Coelodonta antiquitatis skull in the mess hall freezer, you may be pleased to hear that the medic has successfully patched up the cook after he was gored by the contraption. However, the cook would like to offer his compliments on the fine practical joke. He especially enjoyed the googly eyes mounted in the eye sockets, but would like to request something less pointy next time the urge to engage in merry mischief strikes.

In other news, I would like to announce that Dr. Kippers was the winner of the impromptu ice sculpture contest outside the ship last night. I would like to congratulate him on his expert use of quantum variations to create an ice megaladon that existed in no less then seven dimensions simultaneously.

Second place went to Dr. Savant for her fully articulated and energetic singing ice monkeys. Their rendition of “Danny Boy” was truly moving.

Lastly, honorable mention goes to intern #36 for his ice Tesla coil.

Good job everyone!

Sincerely,

- Captain Tortuga

Practical Use of Zombies – Zombie soldiers on the battlefield? Sounds like a solid plan to us. What could possibly go wrong? That zombie bacon does sound awfully tasty too…

It’s a Sand Trap! Poor Little Mars Rover… -If only they had gone for the sand trap bustin’ flip action add on… It’s still functional other than not being about to wander anymore. One day someone will go out there and give it a good kick to dislodge it, in the mean time, we’re waiting for the Mars Webcam.

Mmmm, Gummy Heart (with bloody center) – It’s the perfect mid-afternoon office snack!

One Step Closer to Nuclear Fusion – With giant lasers! Sure, there’s still the minor issue of creating a controlled fusion with fuel pellets that don’t cost ten thousand dollars each. By the way, is it just me or does that test room look like Xavier’s Cerebro?

Humans, Mostly Virus – Maybe not, but we do have an awful lot  in common in our genome with the little buggers. I suppose that’s just a side effect of being lifeforms on planet Earth. However, it does bring up some interesting questions about virus’ role in our evolution. Very interesting stuff.

Flexible Sheets Capture Energy from Movement – Human power plants are on their way! I suppose the medical uses for this stuff would be useful too.

Salutations!

I hope everyone is in good spirits today. If not, well, never fear! The hard working scientists aboard the S.S. Isopod have been trawling the depths of the interwebtubes for spirit lifting goodness. Though the use of our Amusement-o-tron Confabulator Scanning Device Mark II^TM, the scientists have just uncovered the journals of a Mr. Edmund Finney and his Quest to Find the Meaning of Life.

This comic follows the misadventures of Edmund Finney and all the whimsical and interesting characters he meets along the way.  It’s good fun and has quickly become one of the crew’s favorites.

Today’s comic has especially resonated with the scientists as they have the habit of finding themselves in awkward situations approximately 48.23% more often than the average person.

Yes. They measured.

Check out the comic here.

Good day and happy travels.

Sincerely,

- Captain Tortuga

Moon Caves! – Is any other description really needed? We think not.

Vampire Stars – Ooooo! Sparkles!

Glowing Bomb Hunting Bacteria – Scientists have developed bacteria that glows in the presence of explosives.

The Wonderscope! – NPR is looking for some mad scientists to help them put together a series of educational scientific wonderment. So, if you fancy you know enough about a particular topic to explain it in a fun and creative way, now’s your chance to grab your slice of internet fame.

Dr. MegaVolt – … and his mighty Tesla coil of DOOM! (Warning: Video contains a couple seconds of assless-chaps).

Junk food turns rats into addicts – Ah, the addictive qualities of the Ho Ho. I wonder if they go though Ho Ho withdrawals when deprived of the tasty treats.

Laser Blasting Memories Into The Brain – Now the question must be asked, why didn’t the S.S. Isopod scientists come up with this first?? Brain… LASERS, for Thor’s sake!

Redefining self, phantom self – It’s good to know that if you ever get tentacles integrated into your body it will be a simple task learning how to manipulate them.

The 10 most truly, utterly evil things in sci-fi – That’s EEEVIL.

Meet BigDog’s Two-Legged Brother – Is it just me, or do these remind you of those cleaning droids from Star Wars? I wonder if you have to buy it shoes?

2009 Portland Zombie Walk & Thriller Dance | Pictures + Video – Because if you have that many Zombies in one place, there is some law that requires them to break out and dance at some point.