To: All
From: Captain Tortuga
Re: Thar be cupcakes!
To whomever parked the minisub in the moon-pool last, please try again. The entry hatch needs to be pointed up. In the air. Not, I repeat, NOT submerged. You have until lunchtime to remedy the situation, otherwise I will be forced to implement some experimental disciplinary measures.
On a lighter note, the cook has informed me that he is making his special subharmonic cupcakes for dessert tonight. They’re sure to disappear quickly, so show up early to dinner. Mmmm… cupcakes. I can almost taste their delicious sugary resonant vibratory goodness.
Doc Gestalt would like to thank all folks who attended her ultra super extra fun time tea party last week. She wanted to let all those who participated know that the splicing wounds should heal up within the week with minimal scarring and side effects. She also wanted to extend a special thanks to those who donated misc. mammalian parts to the party. She said it was a huge success. The next ultra super extra fun time tea party is tentatively scheduled the third Saturday of next month.
Also, a small reminder. Please, do NOT feed the sea gnomes. I know they’re cute with those big eyes and pointy hats and the way they click their claws is adorable. They are still parasitic vermin with epic breeding capabilities and should not be encouraged. Our fumigation bots are already working at full capacity. Need I remind you what happens when levels aboard this ship overflow with sea gnomes? Hmm? Surely, you all remember. Level 5 will never smell quite right again. So, please, put your food and experiment scraps in the proper trash or recycling receptacle. Also, any crew members caught keeping sea gnomes as pets will be subjected to experimental disciplinary measures.
Sincerely,
- Captain Tortuga
Best. Cupcakes. Ever.